Tag Archives: children and fear

Children and Fear and Child Counseling in Oradell and Franklin Lakes, NJ

Morrisa Drobnick, LCSW, staff writer and advice columnist of “KIDS Magazine” answers a questions about children and fear.

Q – My son is afraid to go on the school bus. He is six years old and says he’d rather I take him and pick him up. What can I do? – A Working Mom, Hackensack.

A – Fears and phobias are common and within the normal range for a school age child. Focus your attention on helping your child cope with his fears. Ask him what makes him afraid of taking the bus. You may be surprised by his answer. A rattling window or the thought that the driver might not bring him home are both upsetting to a kid. Get him to express himself by role-playing, storytelling, or discussion.

Help him feel his inner strength. Acknowledge that life sometimes is scary. You could say, “Yes, I understand that you are afraid of going on the school bus, but I know you are brave and strong and it will be OK. I know you can do it.” Let him have his fears and learn how to handle them. Brainstorm with him about what he could do to conquer his fear or cope with it. Tell your child how you work at overcoming your fears. Don’t battle with him. Praise his progress. Tell him each day how well he is doing on the bus ride and remind him that tomorrow you know he will do even better.

This is a lesson here: Sometimes in life, we have to settle and compromise when we can’t have our first choice.

The Mars & Venus Counseling Center is here to help.  We are located in Teaneck, Oradell, and Ramsey. NJ.

 

 

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Children and Halloween in Bergen County

Halloween in Bergen County means fun, candy, and pretending, but three, four, and five year olds do not have a true understanding of fantasy and reality. Children can express fear around this holiday to indicate that they need help with sorting things out. When children express fearfulness, a parent can help best by being sensitive and supportive.

Children’s emotional development can progress and regress at certain points. Kids may handle an emotion, such as fear, with some control one moment, and then the next day may exhibit no control over the same fear. One minute preschoolers may be thrilled with their choice of Halloween costume, and then the next minute they refuse to wear it.

Understand why your child is fearful. Fears might help him control a situation, or withdraw, and not participate. Any new experience can be frightening to a young child, even dressing up to collect candy.

Accept children’s fears. Do not overreact. A strong reaction could cause your child’s fears to increase. Be matter of fact: “Vampires are scary, so it’s ok to be afraid, but these are kids dressed up as vampires. They want to collect candy just like you do.”

The Mars & Venus Counseling Center is here to help.  We are located in Teaneck, Oradell, and Ramsey. NJ.

Contact us when you need us.  We are here for you.

 

 

Halloween